I WISH . . .

I get so angry when I think of tiny pre-born babies being dismembered (ripped apart) by abortion doctors (using the term “doctors” loosely) I can’t stand it!

I envision the violence which enrages me, and then subsequently, grieves me even more . . . tiny body parts being violently sucked apart. It’s a bloody picture.

It’s a righteous anger I feel, so I know it’s ok … … but at times I wonder why the Holy Spirit laid this on my heart so heavily … if I can do nothing about it.

It’s ” selfish wants” that cause people to ‘get rid” of the inconvenience . . . it was for me . . . almost 5 decades ago. My 15 year-old daughter had run away from her mom’s. When I tracked her down … and brought her home to live with me … that’s when I found out she was pregnant. I “wanted” a better life for her.

At that time, I believed the lie – that it was only a “blob of flesh.” She didn’t want an abortion but I insisted – she was pretty and her boyfriend had abandoned her; having a baby at that age was an expressway to poverty.

Maybe it has to do with my guilt. I know that once I was convicted of what I’d done, I grieved for what seems weeks. My wife at the time kept telling that — as we were now Christians and felt remorse, that I  was forgiven …  now, I find myself holding a graphically offensive sign of an aborted baby’s body parts on busy Seattle streets.  I know I’m forgiven but I still grieve for those who’ve not yet come to that ….  Plus, I pray that I may img_0096impact someone who passes by …  (the signs come from abortionno.org)

Jodi, my daughter, died a year ago; I’ll never know for sure, why she hated me so after that, but it seems obvious to me; she’d refused to talk to me for well over a decade …  here is the photo of her as a little girl’ it shows her innocence . . .

Abortions have eternal consequences — ask almost any ‘almost mom‘ … in my mind, Jodi will always be my little girl, and I loved her so much – still do – – always will.  I’m confident that she knew I loved her … she … just couldn’t forgive me.

I’m remarried now and my beautiful wife also got pregnant young; the difference is, she carried Michelle to term and gave her up for adoption … … … a few years back, she found Michelle and it’s so uplifting to watch their relationship grow … to see what could have been …

I wish . . .

to close this, I’m not so sure there’s nothing I can do about it.  I believe the Holy Spirit may have given me a plan …  if you’re in the Seattle area and willing to help, leave me a reply.  I cannot do this alone.

1/27/7. — Praise God!  I just read this Great news: https://www.lifesitenews.com/news/arkansas-governor-signs-ban-on-dismembering-unborn-babies-in-abortion

About josiahe

Watching closely, working to understand all I may, in this "Age of Information", even from my limited view, I can see much of what's going on ..... and I oft see it's going to impact all of us which is why I share it. My focus is to expose evil, and to serve my Lord and savior Jesus in whatever way He shows me. If one waits long enough, better writers will come along and comment; it's just that I have so little patience with the evil that lurks among us and I've wasted so much time and now, there is so little left! WELCOME!
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2 Responses to I WISH . . .

  1. Michael Hamilton says:

    John, I cannot imagine how that particular ‘guilt feeling’ must be to bear all these years. Do you imagine that was the basis for your daughter’s actions/inactions?

    • josiahe says:

      It breaks my heart! Re: your ?, I do … suspect so, but have no way to know for sure.

      Originally, we were told that her husband was suspected of killing her – no way to tell that either . . . He’s now released and the only thing we know for certain is that he loved her — at the end – don’t know . . . They were both druggies and alcoholics . . .


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